So I had another date with the guy. Well, it wasn't really a date. Even if he did pay. Whatever. Anyway. I called him this morning, he was just a mile or two away at his new house and asked if I wanted to go have breakfast. So we went to Mimi's and had a nice time. We had a good talk about baseball and his house and work and things. Very low-key.
I know that some of my friends have a little bit of concern about this. But when we went out last week, we said that we'd be friends, hang out, and just have fun. And today was just that. No hugs, no kisses, just hanging out and talking. And then when we talked about the next time, it was the same thing. We'll see what comes up and have no set plans. There're vague plans to go to a ballgame, I offered to help him move, but really, nothing definite. This is totally different than last year, so I have no idea or expectations of what will happen.
Monday, July 27, 2009
Friday, July 24, 2009
The Date
So I realized last night that it's been just over a year since I'd seen this guy. I'll have to remember to point it out to him. He's the one who sees portents all over the place. But that's just kinda funny, that a year after I last see him, he finds my number and we go out again.
Anyways, he picked me up, we went to see a movie, took a drive, had a late dinner, and then he took me home. We saw Star Trek, which I hadn't seen, and I completely loved. We drove past the house he's buying, which is only a couple miles away from my apartment. We talked a lot, several times about how weird it was that we were out on a date again.
I think we finally established that we'll go out again, and it's just hanging out and having fun. Of course, he said something similar last year about seeing where this might all go, but then a week later it was basically over. His daughters come back in about 2 weeks, so we'll find out then if this goes on after that.
So it was interesting, and fun, and I will go out with him again, but I'm going to be a great deal more cautious about what I let happen. I really don't want to go through what I went through last year.
Anyways, he picked me up, we went to see a movie, took a drive, had a late dinner, and then he took me home. We saw Star Trek, which I hadn't seen, and I completely loved. We drove past the house he's buying, which is only a couple miles away from my apartment. We talked a lot, several times about how weird it was that we were out on a date again.
I think we finally established that we'll go out again, and it's just hanging out and having fun. Of course, he said something similar last year about seeing where this might all go, but then a week later it was basically over. His daughters come back in about 2 weeks, so we'll find out then if this goes on after that.
So it was interesting, and fun, and I will go out with him again, but I'm going to be a great deal more cautious about what I let happen. I really don't want to go through what I went through last year.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
I'm a little bit confused.
And I don't know what to think right now.
Last summer I was dating a guy who I really liked. Only he was Catholic and I'm Mormon. (Just a little detail, right?) I thought things were going really well. But at the end of the summer, he seemed to back off some. I don't really remember exactly what he said, but the end result was that the religious difference was too much to deal with, so we shouldn't date. And then there was some sort of comment that if we were meant to be together that somehow, someway, God and life would just happen that we meet again.
I think that's the most annoying thing to hear. "If we're meant to be, then we'll be together later." Well, what if this was our only chance, and you won't get another, and you're tossing it away?
I am a firm believer of the reality of God leading my life, if I let Him. I fully believe that He can guide things so that they work out according to His plan and what's best for me. But, I also believe that you should make the most of your opportunities when they're in front of you and not wait for another chance.
Anyway, I didn't figure I'd ever hear from this guy again. So when my phone rings this afternoon and his name is on the display, I am completely shocked. I just stared at my phone for a moment or two. He wants to go to a movie and catch up and everything.
Of course I want to see him. A month ago I was thinking about him and even got so far as to try to look up his address to send him a card or something. Then I thought better of it. And really, he was the one who wanted to put everything up to chance, or luck, or God's will, or the universe, or whatever you want to call it. If he wanted to see me, he would figure out how to contact me.
So he found my phone number and called. So I guess we're seeing a movie. I have to call him in a bit to tell him about the movies and times.
I don't know what to think. I don't know what he wants. But I do know that I have to go home and change my shirt and try to play with my hair, because I am not going out looking like I'm on my way to a baseball game.
Last summer I was dating a guy who I really liked. Only he was Catholic and I'm Mormon. (Just a little detail, right?) I thought things were going really well. But at the end of the summer, he seemed to back off some. I don't really remember exactly what he said, but the end result was that the religious difference was too much to deal with, so we shouldn't date. And then there was some sort of comment that if we were meant to be together that somehow, someway, God and life would just happen that we meet again.
I think that's the most annoying thing to hear. "If we're meant to be, then we'll be together later." Well, what if this was our only chance, and you won't get another, and you're tossing it away?
I am a firm believer of the reality of God leading my life, if I let Him. I fully believe that He can guide things so that they work out according to His plan and what's best for me. But, I also believe that you should make the most of your opportunities when they're in front of you and not wait for another chance.
Anyway, I didn't figure I'd ever hear from this guy again. So when my phone rings this afternoon and his name is on the display, I am completely shocked. I just stared at my phone for a moment or two. He wants to go to a movie and catch up and everything.
Of course I want to see him. A month ago I was thinking about him and even got so far as to try to look up his address to send him a card or something. Then I thought better of it. And really, he was the one who wanted to put everything up to chance, or luck, or God's will, or the universe, or whatever you want to call it. If he wanted to see me, he would figure out how to contact me.
So he found my phone number and called. So I guess we're seeing a movie. I have to call him in a bit to tell him about the movies and times.
I don't know what to think. I don't know what he wants. But I do know that I have to go home and change my shirt and try to play with my hair, because I am not going out looking like I'm on my way to a baseball game.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
A good week. So far.
Some fun things happened this week.
I found a new friend. Well, she's rather making me be her friend. But it's been a while since I've had a new friend, so why not? And, new friend cuts hair, so I finally got my hair cut. It's short and bouncy again.
Today my roommate and I took my niece to the baseball game. That is some good fun times. Even if she insists on playing at the playgrounds for most of the game. But she got to hug Baxter, and be on the big screen.
The Diamondbacks have won five in a row, and have finally swept a series. It's been more than a year since they won five, and the first series sweep of the year. Hopefully this is a sign of good things to come. Or at least an end of last place.
As a counselor in the Relief Society, part of my responsibilities is to go on visits to the sisters of the ward. As the unmarried counselor, I took our ward's SA rep on visits tonight. Tonight was really the first time I felt like I really knew what I was doing as a representative of the Relief Society, of the ward, and of Heavenly Father. I'd had little glimpses of that in the last few weeks of visits. But tonight was different. We visited two sisters, both divorced, one with 2 girls and the other with 1 boy. And in conversation with the first, the topic turns to marriage and everything. (What else is going to come up when you have 3 single women sitting and chatting? Things like how I'm getting a Stripling Warrior and all that.) And all of a sudden, I'm talking and saying stuff that I've said before, but never to this sister. And I look over and she's leaning forwards and is intent on my words, and I realize that she needed to hear what I had to say. That my calm acceptance of this life is because of the great hope and trust of what the next life holds. And trust in the Plan and Mercy of God. It was a rather awesome moment.
So, yeah, a good week so far. I have an interesting day ahead tomorrow. And more baseball, too. So things are good, and I'm thinking more cheerful thoughts.
See, I told you my next post would be happier! Have a happy rest of the week!
I found a new friend. Well, she's rather making me be her friend. But it's been a while since I've had a new friend, so why not? And, new friend cuts hair, so I finally got my hair cut. It's short and bouncy again.
Today my roommate and I took my niece to the baseball game. That is some good fun times. Even if she insists on playing at the playgrounds for most of the game. But she got to hug Baxter, and be on the big screen.
The Diamondbacks have won five in a row, and have finally swept a series. It's been more than a year since they won five, and the first series sweep of the year. Hopefully this is a sign of good things to come. Or at least an end of last place.
As a counselor in the Relief Society, part of my responsibilities is to go on visits to the sisters of the ward. As the unmarried counselor, I took our ward's SA rep on visits tonight. Tonight was really the first time I felt like I really knew what I was doing as a representative of the Relief Society, of the ward, and of Heavenly Father. I'd had little glimpses of that in the last few weeks of visits. But tonight was different. We visited two sisters, both divorced, one with 2 girls and the other with 1 boy. And in conversation with the first, the topic turns to marriage and everything. (What else is going to come up when you have 3 single women sitting and chatting? Things like how I'm getting a Stripling Warrior and all that.) And all of a sudden, I'm talking and saying stuff that I've said before, but never to this sister. And I look over and she's leaning forwards and is intent on my words, and I realize that she needed to hear what I had to say. That my calm acceptance of this life is because of the great hope and trust of what the next life holds. And trust in the Plan and Mercy of God. It was a rather awesome moment.
So, yeah, a good week so far. I have an interesting day ahead tomorrow. And more baseball, too. So things are good, and I'm thinking more cheerful thoughts.
See, I told you my next post would be happier! Have a happy rest of the week!
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Ponderings and Musings - Updated
Regrets and memories are funny things.
Some events I wish I could go back and change. Some things I wish I could undo. Foolishness or carelessness, little things and big things. Usually I wish I could just erase the memory, because it's irritating to dwell on something that I can't change. I dislike thinking of things that make me feel foolish.
Some memories I pull out and look over often. I'll linger over them, replay them, and often try to rearrange things.
Some of those memories I linger over also have regrets attached to them. And I'm quite sure that I'm not the only one to ever do that, look back and regret and wish.
But the strangest thing about my regrets? Sometimes I wish I had more of them.
If I can't go back and undo a mistake, I wish I had made more of them.
As those mistakes shaped who I am now, would one or two more make a difference?
Part of me wants to tell you the mistakes I'm thinking of, but there would be no real point in it. Why should I drag you into those memories of mistakes, which could only be weird and uncomfortable for you. And if those mistakes have been fixed or smoothed over or gotten over, why should I bring them up?
I don't really fall into this mindset very often, and it annoys me when I do. But I wondered. Do any of you wish that you had made more mistakes, made different wrong choices? You don't have to tell me what they are, but it would be nice to know that I'm not the only one who does this.
(I know this is kind of a downer of a post. Next time I'll try to talk about more positive things.)
UPDATED: Since I don't know who all reads the comments, I wanted to make sure this showed up. Kristi commented and said the following: "I wish I had taken more opportunities that could have turned into regrets. I wish I had done more when I was younger. Taken more chances." That's such a better way of looking at all this. And it put me thinking in a different direction, which is always good.
Some events I wish I could go back and change. Some things I wish I could undo. Foolishness or carelessness, little things and big things. Usually I wish I could just erase the memory, because it's irritating to dwell on something that I can't change. I dislike thinking of things that make me feel foolish.
Some memories I pull out and look over often. I'll linger over them, replay them, and often try to rearrange things.
Some of those memories I linger over also have regrets attached to them. And I'm quite sure that I'm not the only one to ever do that, look back and regret and wish.
But the strangest thing about my regrets? Sometimes I wish I had more of them.
If I can't go back and undo a mistake, I wish I had made more of them.
As those mistakes shaped who I am now, would one or two more make a difference?
Part of me wants to tell you the mistakes I'm thinking of, but there would be no real point in it. Why should I drag you into those memories of mistakes, which could only be weird and uncomfortable for you. And if those mistakes have been fixed or smoothed over or gotten over, why should I bring them up?
I don't really fall into this mindset very often, and it annoys me when I do. But I wondered. Do any of you wish that you had made more mistakes, made different wrong choices? You don't have to tell me what they are, but it would be nice to know that I'm not the only one who does this.
(I know this is kind of a downer of a post. Next time I'll try to talk about more positive things.)
UPDATED: Since I don't know who all reads the comments, I wanted to make sure this showed up. Kristi commented and said the following: "I wish I had taken more opportunities that could have turned into regrets. I wish I had done more when I was younger. Taken more chances." That's such a better way of looking at all this. And it put me thinking in a different direction, which is always good.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)